Hogwarts the Musical?
by Pheonixxsong
Summary: Something very strange and frightening is happening in Hogwarts.


Harry stared at the Steak and Kidney pie in front of him. It didn't look as appealing as it did sitting on the table, Harry presumed his eyes were too big for his stomach. He prodded it with his fork,

"Harry!" Said Hermione shooting him a glare,

"What?" He said dropping his fork, no one noticed from all the chatter that was going on,

"Didn't your mother ever tell you not t –," she stopped her eyes wide, "I'm so sorry," she said looking back down,

"Well no, the Dursley's didn't, judging by Dudley I doubt Petunia had told him either," he said. Ron snorted,

"Too right," he said, "your lucky… in some aspect I guess, my mum is constantly on my back about stuff like that," he put on an imitation of Mrs. Weasley's voice, "Ronald! Put your fork in your right hand! Don't slouch! The fork is meant to face downward!" He rolled his eyes,

"Hasn't seemed to have worked though," said Harry so only Hermione could hear, but Hermione was staring at Ron, Harry could not see her eyes but just the way she was sitting he knew she was glaring at him.

Hermione stood up on the bench as her rant continued. Her eyes piercing Ron, he backed up slightly intimidated by her fury. "Ron!" She said, "You should not tell your mother off like that! She does a hell of a lot for you! She has to put up with all of you including Fred and George (need I say more,) yet she still finds time to discipline all of you! You. Are. So. Selfish!" She stepped up on the table kicking away some plates which some students caught from falling to the ground dirtying their robes.

"Ronald! Don't you understand?

No no I don't think you do.

The toils of being a woman.

Of raising a family.

All you do is complain.

Well baby, I've got something to say.

You. Are. Immature, Selfish, and Idiotic.

How can you be so silly,

As to insult the only

Woman who will ever love youuuu.

You idiot! She's your mother,

She's cared for you

And how do you repay her?

By being a little brat."

Hermione stopped suddenly, her eyes bulging in realization. She took a seat, blushing furiously. Ron just stared at her, Harry and Ron exchanged very scared glances of what Hermione had just did, Ron frowned,

"I'm not a brat" he commented. Hermione just glared at him once more and stood up running from the Great Hall. Everyone stared after her a bit shocked. Even Dumbledore had wide eyes, his fork half way up to his lips. Everyone began talking,

"What the ruddy hell was that!" Said Harry,

"Where did that music come from!?" Said Ron, they burst into hysterics, Hermione, had just been singing, on the table. They stopped, still smiling and returned to their meal.

* * *

They were at their Potion's classroom; Hermione was still very timid about what she had done at lunch. She claimed she didn't know what was wrong with her,

"Sing us a song Granger," said Malfoy with a laugh, the door opened,

"Inside," said Snape, looking at all of them in the eye, his eyes rested on Hermione and he sneered, stepping aside to let them all through before closing the door.

They entered the dark classroom, they all took their seat,

"Today we will be…." Snape cringed for a second, "making love potions, you are by no means to use this in everyday situations. However Dumbledore has ordered me to show you them in hope you would be able to recognize them and eliminate them," he sighed, flicking his wand, a list of instructions appeared on the board; one for the love potion and one for the remedy.

"I expect this all to be complete by the end of the lesson and on my desk, begin now," he said striding over to his chair and sitting down. They all stood up, walking over to the cupboard to fetch the ingredients. Harry returned to his seat and began to make the potion, Snape walked behind him. Expecting the usual rude comment, he continued to look at the potion, adding in a drop of gahla acid.

Suddenly he felt a hand on his head, he frowned, what on earth? Snape began playing with Harry's hair; Harry had to admit… he was scared. Hermione walked over to her seat and noticed Snape and stopped dead in her tracks,

"Lovely hair Potter," said Snape, then he smiled. Yes; Snape smiled. He strolled away, Hermione tried very hard to hide her laughter, she sat down next to Harry,

"What the bloody hell was that!" said Harry looking at her, "did you see that! He was playing with my hair! What kind of person does that? What Teacher does that? It was Snape! What the hell is up with people today? Is there something in the water that is making everyone act completely bonkers?" He questioned as Ron walked over,

"Did I miss something?" Asked Ron, sitting down,

"We are talking about Snape and how weird he is today," said Hermione

"He was playing with my hair!" Said Harry outraged, Ron laughed,

"He seemed perfectly normal at the start of the lesson," they looked at Snape, he was walking over to Neville, they could only just hear what they were saying. He glanced into his cauldron, and Neville gulped, his hand began to shake,

"Simple marvellous," said Snape with a happy smile, "I admire your potion making skills," there was not an ounce of sarcasm in his voice, which for Snape is unheard of. He sat gleefully down at the table; the whole class was now staring at Snape. Why was he acting like that? The class exchanged utterly confused glances, what was the world coming to?

Suddenly, a low drumming sound began, and Harry felt this sudden blurb of words reach his mouth. He looked at Snape, then Ron and Hermione confused before the first lyrical line passed his lips,

"Speaking I come to class expecting the same old thing,

the day has been a little odd already,

But no, it just got a little weirder

Starts singing

coming to class, sitting down

I figured a snide comment from the teacher

And a pathetic attempt at a potion would be all,

But no, everyone seems to be changing

Even I, look here, I'm singing a tune,

Lalala dodo

Dah dah dah do do

People are changing, singing here

Becoming new

Whats with the people today,

Where did the normal world go?

Speaking I mean, understandably so, this is a magical world

Singing but this, but this just isn't how it is

I must be losing my mind,

That's it! Oh yes

I'm losing my mind.

I was excepting the same old

Same old,

But as you see, it isn't so, oh no it isn't so

People are changing

Singing a song like this is a musical

The day has been a little odd already,

It got even weirder when the teacher said

"Lovely hair Potter"

Colour me shocked!

The day is insane"

Harry cupped his hand over his mouth. Only a few students looked rather surprised by this outburst but many, had come to terms that something was up, but nothing terrible. A bunch of students all day had been breaking into dances and songs. So those who had witnessed or experienced first had continued working with out much thought, but a few did stare at Harry wide eyed and confused.

"Wow Harry…"Ron started clapping Harry on the back, "I didn't know you had such a brilliant voice!" He grinned, "you and Hermione should do a duet!" He burst into a fit of laughter. Harry and Hermione shared a look, both a bit frightened by these outbursts. The glance shared became a more meaningful stare as both someone what got lost in each others eyes. Both felt a song coming on but quickly turned away. Harry made a note to talk to Dumbledore about this; this was getting out of control.

"Well," said Ron, turning happily to his cauldron, "I'm just happy I haven't been hit with it yet."

* * *

As Harry, Ron and Hermione left the classroom they were faced with a sight they had never seen before and doubt they'd ever see again. Left, right, and centre people were bursting out of classrooms, filled with music… all in the same tune. Harry stopped in the doorway and people ran into his back.

_"It's a loverly day to be at Hogwarts,_

_It's a loverly day to be alive."_

Harry felt the song rise in his throat and he quickly clapped his hand over his mouth, grabbing Hermione and Ron, he dropped his books and set off at a run. When the song became a distant hum they stopped, looking at each other with a dazed confusion.

"It can't be natural," Harry muttered, breathing deeply,

"There's obviously some magic behind it…" agreed Hermione, "no idea what though."

"Well no, I haven't heard of many schools breaking out into _song and dance _and acting like pixies in sunshine town before." said Ron as he slid down the wall into a sitting position. "Surely Dumbledore knows what to do."

"Well it's not exactly a terrifying life or death situation is it?" Began Hermione,

"Yes it is!" Chorused Ron and Harry, Harry began to pace up the corridor.

"What will we do?" he muttered, then began to sing,

"What's going on?

Why are all the songs coming out?

I was a dreamin' about death,

And bad things that loom in the night,

Oh but I thought nothing could stop my plight,

Until we all started singing this tune."

Harry sang, before gazing terrified at Ron and Hermione, "There's no way to stop it!" He grabbed his Griffindor scarf and shoved it into his mouth, gagging himself, only a muffled tune being heard.

"This is an epidemic!" Ron shouted, as Harry began to sway to the music he was so desperately trying to stop singing. "Hermione, what do we do?" Ron grabbed Harry's shoulders to try and keep him stationary, but Harry just held Ron's wrists and began spinning in three-step.

"I have no idea!" She said, bending her head she shut her eyes, "I can't remember _anything _about this ever happening before. I don't even know of a curse which can do this!" Ron had now grabbed Harry by the scruff of the neck, his mouth was moving around the scarf, an audible song bursting from his throat with words which were impossible to distinguish.

"Oh bloody hell," Ron muttered and he threw a punch at Harry, knocking him to the ground. Ron massaged his knuckles,

"_Ron!" _Yelled Hermione angrily, "That is not how we're going to settle this!"

"What? He _wanted _me to, he was asking with his eyes… weren't you Harry?" Harry stood, rubbing his cheek,

"Was it necessary to punch me that hard?"

"It was a damn annoying song! It needed effort behind it." All three of them sighed, thinking.

"Well," said Harry, "until we work out something we're going to have to sit through this torture," Hermione smirked,

"I think we'll live."

* * *

_This was something I wrote ages ago for a laugh with a friend, I've fixed it up and added more then felt I had to share it :) _

_I don't know if I'll post any more chapters. It depends how many people like it._

_Pheonixxsong! hums a song _


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